Nw BBS 壬天堂世界

 找回密码
 注册
搜索
热搜: 资料集合
查看: 1620|回复: 5
收起左侧

google很那啥【XSK】

[复制链接]
发表于 2010-2-23 10:21:42 | 显示全部楼层 |阅读模式
本帖最后由 dinapc 于 2010-2-23 11:23 编辑

Dr. Laura Schlessinger is a radio personality who dispenses advice to people who call in to her radio show. Recently, she said that, as an observant Orthodox Jew, homosexuality is an abomination according to Leviticus 18:22 and cannot be condoned under any circumstance. The following is an open letter to Dr. Laura penned by a east coast resident, which was posted on the Internet. It's funny, as well as informative:

Dear Dr. Laura:

Thank you for doing so much to educate people regarding God's Law. I have learned a great deal from your show, and try to share that knowledge with as many people as I can. When someone tries to defend the homosexual lifestyle, for example, I simply remind them that Leviticus 18:22 clearly states it to be an abomination. End of debate. I do need some advice from you, however, regarding some of the other specific laws and how to follow them:

When I burn a bull on the altar as a sacrifice, I know it creates a pleasing odor for the Lord - Lev.1:9. The problem is my neighbors. They claim the odor is not pleasing to them. Should I smite them?

I would like to sell my daughter into slavery, as sanctioned in Exodus 21:7. In this day and age, what do you think would be a fair price for her?

I know that I am allowed no contact with a woman while she is in her period of menstrual uncleanliness - Lev.15:19- 24. The problem is, how do I tell? I have tried asking, but most women take offense.

Lev. 25:44 states that I may indeed possess slaves, both male and female, provided they are purchased from neighboring nations. A friend of mine claims that this applies to Mexicans, but not Canadians. Can you clarify? Why can't I own Canadians?

I have a neighbor who insists on working on the Sabbath. Exodus 35:2 clearly states he should be put to death. Am I morally obligated to kill him myself?

A friend of mine feels that even though eating shellfish is an abomination - Lev. 11:10, it is a lesser abomination than homosexuality. I don't agree. Can you settle this?

Lev. 21:20 states that I may not approach the altar of God if I have a defect in my sight. I have to admit that I wear reading glasses. Does my vision have to be 20/20, or is there some wiggle room here?

Most of my male friends get their hair trimmed, including the hair around their temples, even though this is expressly forbidden by Lev. 19:27. How should they die?

I know from Lev. 11:6-8 that touching the skin of a dead pig makes me unclean, but may I still play football if I wear gloves?

My uncle has a farm. He violates Lev. 19:19 by planting two different crops in the same field, as does his wife by wearing garments made of two different kinds of thread (cotton/polyester blend). He also tends to curse and blaspheme a lot. Is it really necessary that we go to all the trouble of getting the whole town together to stone them? - Lev.24:10-16. Couldn't we just burn them to death at a private family affair like we do with people who sleep with their in-laws? (Lev. 20:14)

I know you have studied these things extensively, so I am confident you can help. Thank you again for reminding us that God's word is eternal and unchanging.

Your devoted fan,
Jim


-----------华丽的分割线-------------

劳拉博士施莱辛格是无线电个性配售意见,谁的人谁打电话给她的广播节目。最近,她说,作为一个细心的东正教犹太人,同性恋是根据利未记18点22分令人深恶痛绝的,不能在任何情况下宽恕。以下是一封公开信劳拉博士由东海岸的居民,这是在互联网上公布执笔。这很有趣,以及信息:

亲爱的劳拉:

感谢他们这么多教育人们对神的法你。我从你的节目有很大,并尝试与知识分享尽可能多的人可以。当有人试图捍卫同性恋的生活方式,例如,我只是提醒他们,利未记18时22分明确规定它是一种侮辱。结束辩论。我需要一些您的建议,但是,就其他一些具体的法律,以及如何跟着他们:

当我在刻录作为牺牲祭坛牛市,我知道它会创建一个主 - Lev.1:9愉快的气味。问题是我的邻居。他们声称的气味不是取悦他们。我应该重击呢?

我想卖我的女儿为奴,在出埃及记21点07的制裁。在这个时代,你觉得这是对她公平的价格?

我知道,我不允许任何一个女人联系,而她在不洁的月经期 - Lev.15:19 - 24是。问题是,我怎么说?我试着问,但大多数妇女见怪。

列弗。 25:44说,我可能的确拥有奴隶,不论是男性还是女性,只要是从邻国购买。我的一个朋友声称,这适用于墨西哥人,但不是加拿大人。你能澄清?为什么我不能拥有加拿大人?

我有一个邻居谁在安息日上坚持工作。出埃及记35:2明确指出他应该被处死。我在道义上有义务要杀死他自己?

我的一个朋友认为,即使吃贝类动物是一种侮辱 - 列夫。 11:10,这是一个比同性恋较小侮辱。我不同意。你能解决吗?

列弗。 21:20国家,我可以不接近上帝的祭坛,如果我在我的视线一种缺陷。我必须承认,我戴老花镜。我的视力是否要20/20,还是有一些回旋余地这里?

我的男性朋友大多得到他们的头发修整,包括寺庙周围的头发,即使这是列夫明确禁止。 19:27。应当如何死?

我从列夫。 11:6-8,触摸的死让我猪皮不洁的,但我还是踢足球,如果我戴上手套?

我叔叔有一个农场。他违反列夫。种植在同一领域两个不同的作物19时19分,另外,还有穿着两种不同类型的线(棉/聚酯混纺)成衣他的妻子。他还倾向于诅咒,亵渎了很多东西。是否真的有必要到所有获得全镇一起石头他们麻烦吗? - Lev.24 :10 - 16。我们不能只焚烧私人家事他们死刑的人一样,我们与谁同睡的,法律怎么办? (利未记20:14)

我知道你研究过这些事情广泛,所以我相信你可以提供帮助。谢谢你再次提醒我们,神的话是永恒不变的。

你的歌迷,
吉姆




很蛋痛。。。。。。。
回复

使用道具 举报

发表于 2010-2-23 11:03:00 | 显示全部楼层
但我还是踢足球,如果我戴上手套

听广播被洗脑了= =
回复

使用道具 举报

发表于 2010-2-23 11:05:03 | 显示全部楼层
不会标重点吗?
回复

使用道具 举报

发表于 2010-2-23 11:06:25 | 显示全部楼层
不会标重点吗?
4148ilyvm 发表于 2010-2-23 11:05

因为整篇都很重点........
回复

使用道具 举报

 楼主| 发表于 2010-2-23 11:19:43 | 显示全部楼层
不会标重点吗?
4148ilyvm 发表于 2010-2-23 11:05


好吧。。。顺应观众要求,你==
回复

使用道具 举报

发表于 2010-2-23 12:08:54 | 显示全部楼层
本帖最后由 adolyan 于 2010-2-27 23:31 编辑

真蛋疼

本帖子中包含更多资源

您需要 登录 才可以下载或查看,没有帐号?注册

x
回复

使用道具 举报

您需要登录后才可以回帖 登录 | 注册

本版积分规则

QQ|小黑屋|手机版|Archiver|Nw壬天堂世界 ( 京ICP备05022083号-1 京公网安备11010202001397号 )

GMT+8, 2024-9-24 01:17 , Processed in 0.052047 second(s), 4 queries , Redis On.

Powered by Discuz! X3.4 Licensed

© 2001-2017 Comsenz Inc.

快速回复 返回顶部 返回列表