[超级恶搞] GBA<光明力量 暗龙复活>隐藏剧情和对话

Kayin

转些篇国外SF玩家们的恶搞文

需注明的是国外有的人很害怕马戏团的小丑们，对它们有特殊的恐惧。






From: DragonUser84 | Posted: 6/14/2004 7:43:12 AM | Message Detail
I think pretty much everyone knows about these, so to kick things off...

(During the battle in the circus tent...)
Mae: AAAAAAAAAAHHH!
Max: What's the matter?
Mae: Clowns!
Max: Wha-?
Nova: Max, ever since Mae was a little, she's had a terrible fear of clowns.
Max: Why?
Mae: IT WAS A BAD EXPERIENCE, OKAY?!
Max: Okay, okay. Well, let's just end this as quickly as possible...
(A few turns later...)
Max: Mae! Attack the Dire Clown!
Mae: Eeep...
(Mae stabs the Dire Clown, getting it stuck on her lance.)
Mae: AAAAAHHH! IT'S STUCK ON MY LANCE! GETITOFF! GETITOFF! GETITOFF! (Starts beating the clown against the floor of the stage.) GETITOFF! GETITOFF! GETITOFF!
Max: I'm busy with the marinade!
Nova: You mean Marionette.
Max: Whatever.
(Marionette casts Freeze lvl 4 on Max, nearly killing him.)
Max: (Shivering.) T-that's n-n-not c-c-cold...
Gort: I'm busy with the other clown! (To Dire Clown.) This is for my childhood! (Kills clown.)
Tao: I'll get it!
(Tao casts Blaze lvl 1. Dire Clown takes 4 damage. Tao receives 7 experience.)
Tao: Blast! It's still alive!
Mae: (Now beating a nearly-dead, slowly burning, Dire Clown against the floor.) GETITOFF! GETITOFF! GETITOFF!
Anri: Fine...
(Anri casts Blaze lvl 1. Dire Clown takes 4 damage.)
(You have defeated a Dire Clown! Anri receives 36 experience! Gets 120 gold!)
Mae: NOW IT'S GOING TO DO THAT SPINNING AROUND THING! AAAAAAAHHH! (Lets go of lance.)
(Dire clown starts spinning around, then finally explodes, sending the lance into the Marionette's head.)
(Super Attack!)
(Mae's Lance does 34 damage!)
(You defeated Marionette! Mae receives 48 expereince! You get 120 gold!)
(Bonus! You receive a Zombie Charmer!)
Max: (Still shivering.) W-well, I-I'm g-g-glad t-t-that's o-over...
Nova: Now, we find the kid, talk to the mayor, board the boat, and get the **** outta here!
(Later, on the boat, after meeting that witch...)
Nova: Max! We found the kid, talked to the mayor, boarded the boat, and now you need to get the **** outta there!
Max: Darn... At least now I'm not shivering anymore... (Runs off the boat.)

Kayin

另一个人写的


From: I Abibde | Posted: 6/15/2004 4:08:31 PM | Message Detail

Gort: (He is wearing a tuxedo, and he is standing on a stool behind a podium with a microphone tilted down towards his mouth.) And the 2004 Marcus Award -- excuse me, the 2004 Jeigan Award, I can hear you people out there in the fourth row -- goes to ... Hans!

Hans: (He walks up to the podium, accepts the knight-shaped statuette, and starts to give a speech.) I can only say that I am ... honored, in a way, to be the most useless member of the first Shining Force, and ... SPLAT! (He is hit in the face by Yogurt, and he lies unconscious on the stage.)

Yogurt: (He is doing the patented gopher dance from Caddyshack on Hans' chest.) Raaage against the machiiine!

Adam: (He is in the fourth row, stealing popcorn out of a very large bucket in the lap of Lowe, who has artificial butter-flavored grease all over his face and does not seem to notice.) HEY!

Gort: (He attacks Yogurt with a broom.) *SWAT!* Go on, get out of here, get out! Security, if you please?

Zuika: (A giant bug-thing in a hat and trench coat is still a giant bug-thing, but security is security.) Move or be destroyed, little rodent creature.

Yogurt: EEP!

Kayin

From: DragonUser84 | Posted: 6/16/2004 6:16:52 AM | Message Detail
And I was JUST about to give up, thanks I Abibde.

(Max is standing back from the action, letting the other characters level up. Currently, he's watching the fight through binoculars.)
Max: Heh, heh.
Zylo: (Who also happens to be hanging back to let the other chracters level up.) What's so funny?
Max: I'm staring at that hot elf-girl, Diane.
Zylo: Let me see... (Takes the binoculars from Max and looks.)
Zylo: Uhhh... Max? That's not Diane, that's Hans...
Max: (O.O) WHA-?! (Grabs the binoculars back from Zylo.) But, she's got long blonde hair!
Zylo: Diane has PINK hair, Max. Hans has blonde hair in addition to his girlish physique.
Max: (Drops to the ground.) AAAAAHHH! MY EYES! MY POOR EYES!
Zylo: Oh well... (Picks up binoculars and resumes looking at Hans.)
(Hungrily...)
(And drooling...)
(And licking his lips...)
Zylo: Scrawy, but nobody'll miss him...

Kayin

Varios: (He and Mae are on the verge of leaving Castle Guardiana when he turns to lecture Max, who is sitting on a couch.) You had best not have a party while I am out of the castle, young man ... and, remember, drinking is bad!

Max: (Inexplicably, he is wearing baggy pants and a black hooded sweatshirt with a big SEGA logo on it.) I hear you. Have a good time. (As soon as they leave, he jumps up and throws off the sweatshirt to reveal a white T-shirt that has 'TIPSY!' on it in big, red letters.)

*Cue 'Tipsy' from Hood Hop by J-Kwon*

Max: (The castle fills up with all the members of the Shining Force ... except Mae. ... I know, Max can speak in the remake, so there is no reason why he cannot rap.) One, here comes the two to the three to the four, everybody drunk out on the dance floor ...

Hans: (As Max raps the first lyric, Hans stumbles quickly over to a potted plant and vomits in the pot.)

Max: ... every Knight got a level, but they want more ...

Earnest: (Try imagining a Centaur breakdancing. That will keep your mind busy for quite a while.)

Max: ... my babe, Anri, she know she can cast Freeze 4 ... maybe 'cause she got the Herb Trick at its source ...

Anri: (Anri. Daring Dress. Breaking it down in front of the throne. Max is one lucky hero.)

Max: (The song continues, with appropriate visuals, until he gets to the chorus.) Now everybody in the Force, get tipsy!

*Record warps, post ends*

Kayin

From: DragonUser84 | Posted: 6/17/2004 4:41:40 AM | Message Detail
Needs a bump and another outake...

(During a battle...)
Max: Hey! Where's Amon and Balbaroy?
Nova: They said they needed some time alone and they'll catch up halfway through the battle.
Max: Okay, but where are you?
Nova: I'm at headquarters... uh... watching over the two lovebirds-I mean... lovemakers-err...
Max: Well, I'm looking over the battle field and I see pegasus knights all over the place!
Silver Knight: Hurry up and attack! You PCs take FOREVER!
Max: (To Silver Knight.) THE FEELING'S MUTUAL YOU (Censored.)!!! (To Nova.) Tell them to hurry it up!
Nova: Max, I'm not going to break them up, they've got SWORDS and if I do, they'll be MAD! Besides, I'm enjoying this!
Max: Oh for-
Zylo: Fine, I'm taking a break. (Looks at Hans hungrily.) This time, you're NOT getting away!
(Hans screams like a girl and starts running. Zylo soon catches up and... well... Okay, that's just guesome...)
Max: ZYLO! DO YOU HAVE ANY IDEA HOW MUCH WE HAVE TO PAY TO REVIVE HIM?!?!
(Zylo mumbles something, but his mouth is full of Hans.)
Mae: Fine, you guys retreat, I'm going on a killing spree!
(Mae runs up to a Silver Knight and kills it in one hit.)
(Mae gets 2 exp!)
Mae: Only 47 more to go! (Pulls out nickel-plated spear.) Feeling lucky punks?
Max: ARRRGH!!!
Anri: Just so you know Max, I HATE this dress! Either get it out of my Inventory, or I'm leaving!
Tao: Just be glad you're not wearing MY outfit.
Domingo: Domingo, Domingo! (What's the big deal with a dress? I fly around naked all the time!)
Max: That's it, I'm going to the bar...
Gort: No you're not laddie, that's only for adults like me. (Takes a gulp from a flask.)
Max: Fine, I'm killing Yogurt!
Nova: You can't kill Yogurt! He's our mascot!
Yogurt: Nova's right!
(Max kills Yogurt anyway.)
Nova: OUR MASCOT!
Max: Whoopsie, now I have to restart the game now so I can see every little (Censored.) fragment of Yogurt's conversation.
(Amon and Balbaroy show up.)
Balbaroy: Okay, we're ready.
Max: Good. (Screen goes blank.)

Kayin

From: Sketchie | Posted: 6/17/2004 6:50:02 AM | Message Detail
Zylo: Hey, Hans, I wanna talk to you.

Hans: You mean you want to EAT me.

Max: Oh bother. I'm outta here. *leaves*

Zylo: No, no, Hans. You see, I wanted to tell you something, but the wolf side inside me would overtake it.

Hans: Oh? *backs off just in case*

Zylo: You see... *twiddles his fingers*

Hans: Hm?

Zylo: I like you.

Hans: Well, yeah, we're all friends aren't we.

Zylo: No... I like like you.

Hans: ...

Zylo: Well, yeah, anyway... *turns red in the face*

Hans: Uhhh...

Zylo: Hans... *walks up to him and puts his paw on his shoulder*

Hans: ...

Zylo: Just kidding! *eats Hans up*

Hans: ACK!

Max: *walks back in* What are you guys... ZYLO!!! You'll make me go broke if you keep this up! Geesh. Let's go to the priest and get Hans raised...

~Sketchie

Kayin

From: I Abibde | Posted: 6/17/2004 11:01:13 AM | Message Detail
(This post is brought to you by a certain long-running topic on the Metroid Fusion board.)

Narsha: (She is piloting a small space ship while Mawlock and Zuika play 'Go Fish' behind her.) Computer, please contact the B-S-L Laboratory for docking.

Adam: (The computer in MF was already named Adam, so ... short trip.) Roger, Samus, er, Narsha. Copy that. Okie-dokie.

Zuika: Do you have a Ken, Mawlock?

Mawlock: No. Go fish.

Zuika: Hmm. I begin to wonder if there is only one of each card in this deck.

Mawlock: (He grins knowingly.)

Narsha: ....

Zuika: (He sees something in Mawlock's sleeve.) You do have a Ken. ... I have no tolerance for cheating.

Mawlock: You were expecting the Master of the Cards to play fairly?

Zuika: BZZZ! (He goes into his 'low HP' mode, and you all know how that is.)

Narsha: Hey, it is hard to steer the ship when you two are --

Adam: Brace for impact!

(Ship veers away and crashes.)

Kayin

From: Sketchie | Posted: 6/17/2004 11:18:57 AM | Message Detail
Max: Okay, guys, this is it. Are you ready to take the Dark Dragon down?!

Chester: You bet!

Sarah: Let's do it! I'll heal when needed!

Jaha: Choppity-chop!

Kazin: Be careful everyone.

Slade: I'll hit 'em before he knows what happened!

Peter: You do that Slade.

Max: What the...?! Who are you guys?!

Sarah: Aren't you Bowie?

Max: Of course not! *points to the door down the hallway* Shining Force 2 is just down there! And tell my team to come here!

Chester: Alright, alright.

Peter: Sorry for the confusion.

*They all leave. The SF1 gang returns*

Lowe: That was weird, we were in SF2.

Hans: No kidding...

Zylo: *stares at Hans, drooling, with a big toothy grin*

Hans: NOT AGAIN!!!

~Sketchie

Kayin

下面这个最好笑^0^


From: LancenWithmart | Posted: 6/18/2004 7:27:55 AM | Message Detail
Let me see...

(The battle against DarkSol. Max and him change words):

DarkSol: So, you made it. Go this far is an impressive accomplishment. But I'll kill you now, lowly worm.
Max: DarkSol! You evil doings ends now! Prepare for di...
A strange voice: STOP!
(Both of them look for the place where the voice coming. They see three persons: a male human knight, a male human cleric and a female elven mage, all looking like teenagers)
Max: Who ARE you?
DarkSol (surprised): You! But...
Male human knight: ...It cannot be, right? You think that you are going start you own franchise and give us NOTHING, right?
Max (trying understand what's going on): You know they?
DarkSol (shaking): Ah...er...well...
Female elven mage (furious):Dark Sol, you ****** bastard! I'll ****** you, and ******* with you, and ****** you after that, and...
Tao (terrified): A woman don't have to say such things!
Female elven mage: Who you think you are to DARE spoken with me, you lowly clone!
Tao: CLONE?! I'll teach you who are a clone, your....
Max (screaming): Anyone PLEASE can explain this?
Male human knight: We are the Shining in the Darkness characters, and DarkSol was YOUR enemy, not yours!
Max: Eh ?!
Male human knight: After the popularity of the first game, we think that make appearances in other games was a good idea, but this lower piece of garbage escape and resolve make his own line of games!
Max: It's true?
DarkSol: Ah...eh...well...
Human male knight: But now we find you, and nothing can save you for a Lawsuit!!!!!!
DarkSol: Master, please help me!
A powerful voice: At last, I am awakened...
Max: Oh, no! Everybody, stay alert! Paladins prepare for attack! Hans...
(Max looked and are no traces of Hans) Where is he?
Zylo:*brurp!*
Max:HOW...MANY...TIMES...I...HAVE...TO...SAID...TO...YOU...DON'T...EAT...HIM!!!!!!!!!
Zylo: But he's the worst. Character. Ever. Who miss him?
Yougurt: I miss him!
Max: This CANNOT be happening....

To be continued...

Kayin

From: Sketchie | Posted: 6/18/2004 7:27:57 AM | Message Detail
Hans: *screams* Save me, Max!

Max: Zylo's after you again huh?

Hans: Duh! *hides behind Max*

Zylo: *catches up to Max and Hans* Where's Hans? I need to, ahem, 'talk' to him.

Max: He ran thataway! *points to a random direction*

Zylo: Thanks! *runs into that direction*

*pause*

Hans: Thanks Max, you saved my life.

Max: Don't knock it, buddy. We're getting low on funds.

Hans: I wish there was a way to make Zylo stop chasing and eating me...

Max: Hmmm... oh! I know.

Hans: Hm?

Max: Here... take some money and go to the general store. Ask the lady for this... *whispers in Hans' ear*

Hans: *takes the money and nods, and then runs to the general store*

*A bit later...*

Hans: Hey, Zylo, I wanna talk to you!

Zylo: *runs up to Hans* I'm here!

Hans: You're a silly wolf.

Zylo: WHAT?! You dare to call me a silly wolf?! I'LL EAT YOU UP! ...like what I did many times.

Hans: Ack!

Zylo: *eats Hans up* Mmmm... *rubs his tummy* ... *suddenly feels a lot of gurgling in his stomach* Agggh... gotta... potty...

Max: o_o

Zylo: *runs off, holding his stomach*

Max: .... *walks to the general store* Hey, lady behind the counter!

Lady Behind The Counter: Yes, Max?

Max: Thanks for the Ex-Lax!

Lady Behind The Counter: You're welcome!

Max: Now I gotta raise Hans again... I hope Zylo has learned his lesson this time. >_>

~Sketchie

Kayin

From: LancenWithmart | Posted: 6/18/2004 9:09:54 AM | Message Detail
Episode 2:

Dark dragon: At last...after 1000 years I was able to back and now... hum?
Male human knight: So DarkSol works for you right?
Dark Dragon: He's my loyal servant, yes.
Male human knight: AH-HAR! So YOU are responsible for his actions!
Dark Dragon: Yes worm, he obeys all my commands, and now I'll conquest this wor...
Male human knight: Not so fast. You must pay us first, for the use of your license!
Dark Dragon: Pay? What this filth life form are talking about DarkSol?
DarkSol: Ah...eh...well...
Max: You guys have names?
Female elven mage: I'm Pyra Myst, he (pointing the cleric) is Milo Brax.
Max: And he? (pointing the knight)
Pyra: Whatever you call him is OK.
Zylo: I call him dinner...
Max NOT...AGAIN! DO YOU UNDERSTAND?!
Zylo: Yes...(grim for the knight)
Knight whatever-your-name-is (showing Dark Dragon several papers): ...so that's the reason you must pay us.
Dark Dragon: ...This is really Rune?
Pyra: Rune? RUNE?! DarkSol, you even change the of you world? I'll toast your...
Knight whatever-your-name-is: Enough Pyra! So you must pay us 350 billion gold pieces.
Dark Dragon: WHAT?!
Knight whatever-your-name-is: ...not mention the percentage in sales of the remake.
Dark Dragon: DarkSol, you failed me!
DarkSol: Master, please have mercy!
Dark Dragon (turning all three heads to DarkSol): You have mercy? Ill give the acrolytes mercy: the mercy of steel!
(Dark Dragon casts demonbreath, bolt 4 and freeze 4 in DarkSol. You can imagine the result)
DarkSol:AAAARRRGGGGGGGHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!
Max: Well, that's one less for fight...

To be continued...

Kayin

From: Sketchie | Posted: 6/18/2004 10:17:40 AM | Message Detail
Thanks for the nice compliment DragonUser84. XD

And yeah, one guy started the 'Zylo Eating Hans' thing and it just snowballed from there. =P

DarkSol: I shall destroy you and take over the world! MWAHAHAHAHA!!

Max: So what's new? That's a lame line. Almost every villain says it.

DarkSol: Really?

Max: Yes! I'm sick of hearing that all the time. 'I'll destroy you and take over the world' blah blah blah. It gets to you after the 10,000,000th time.

DarkSol: Hmm... what should I say instead?

Max: How about this... *ahem* 'I am DarkSol, the master of the darkness! I can see you invaded my lair! Now I shall use the power of the darkness to make you pay! And then I shall do what I've always planned to do... take over the wimpy world and all of its inhabitants! MWAHAHAHAHAA!'

Everyone: ...

Lowe: You're scary Max.

Hans: You could be a good villain, Max. >_>

Zylo: And you could be a good meal... *grins at Hans*

Hans: *groans*

Max: *steals DarkSol's sword and holds it up above his head* On this sword, I shall smite you all!!! MWAHAHAHAA!!!

Everyone: O_O

Max: Fight me you lowly mortals!! If none of you will approach me I shall kill you all!!!

Lowe: Somebody do something! Max is letting his imagination get to his head! And my crappy Detox spell wouldn't do anything!

Khris: Of course, 'cause you're a crappy healer.

Lowe: ... Khris? Why...? *cries*

Zylo: I'll do something! *eats Hans up*

Hans: ACK!

Max: Well? Is there nobody brave enough to... *looks at Zylo eating Hans up. He snaps out of his trance.* ZYLO!!!! YOU AGAIN!!!

Lowe: Max?

Max: Uh, yeah?

Lowe: You were in a trance there.

Max: Oh? I was?

Lowe: Yes. At least you're back to normal.

Max: Yes... thank god. *hands the sword back to DarkSol, which is stunned on what happened* Sorry about that. I got out of control.

DarkSol: Uh... uh... uh... n-n-no problem... *shutters*

Max: And what... hm... lemme guess, Zylo ate Hans again?

Lowe: Yes... *sigh*

Zylo: *looks sad*

Max: I'll let that one slide this time Zylo.

Zylo: YAY!

~Sketchie

Kayin

From: DragonUser84 | Posted: 6/18/2004 12:01:53 PM | Message Detail
I've got some time to kill... I think I'll give Zylo a break...

Zylo: Doc! You gotta help me! I keep eating Hans!
Psychiatrist: (Aka Quack. He also happens to be a duck.) Well, the only thing I can do is prescribe anti-depressants...
Zylo: How will that help?!
Quack: Well, you'll be really happy that you ate Hans instead of getting depressed about it.
(Zylo is about to to flick off Quack when he thinks better of it and eats him.)
Zylo: BUUUURRRRRP! Hmmm... Could've used some BBQ sauce...

(Meanwhile...)
Max: Okay Hans, Zylo isn't here, so we can actually raise your level without worrying about you getting eaten.
Hans: O-O-Okay...
(Alef is staring at Hans.)
Max: Alef!
Alef: Oh! Don't mind me, I never eat anything unless it's dead and cooked first.
Max: Okay then, we're going to rush those Pegasus Knights. You two stay back and... you know.
(Max, Mae, and everyone else runs off.)
Max: Okay Hans, ATTACK!
(Hans steps forward one square and pulls back on his bow...)
(Alef casts Blaze lvl 3!)
Hans: YAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHH!!!!!
(Hans's strength is gone...)
(Alef jumps onto a well-grilled, dead Hans, and starts eating.)
Yogurt: Sqeak squeak! (Hey, that reminds me, what do DRAGONS eat?)
(Bleu is staring at Yogurt... Hungrily.)
Max: (Sighs.) I give up!
Mawlock: Good. Anyway, Bleu just moved, and Yogurt owes me some money, so... (Casts Move on Bleu's card.)
(Bleu attacks!)
Yogurt: SQUUUUUEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEAAAAKKK!!!!!
(Yogurt's strength is gone...)
(Bleu starts eating Yogurt.)
Bleu: When I become a GREAT dragon, I'm gonna eat a CENTAUR! (Resumes eating.)
Mae: (Grabs her nickel-plated lance.) Don't even think about eating me, PUNK!
Bleu: (While chewing.) I was thinking Ernest or Arthur.
Max: Gort, hand over your flask, I need a drink...
Gort: YOU'RE NOT GETTING MY FLASK, LADDIE! (Downs it all in one gulp.)
Max: Fine, I'm casting Egress!
Mawlock: It's not your turn yet.
Max: I DON'T CARE! (Casts Egress.)
(Back at HQ.)
Zylo: Hey everyone! Wait, where's Hans and Yogurt?
Alef: Uhhh... (Burp!)
Bleu: Errr... (Burp!)
Max: Ahhh... My head...
Nova: Don't ask...

Kayin

From: I Abibde | Posted: 6/21/2004 2:23:03 PM | Message Detail
KILL MAX
VOLUME 1

SCENE: A sushi bar in Waral.

Narsha: (She appears at the front door ... in a tank top and jeans, with a 'SEGA' duffel bag over her shoulder.) Excuse me.

Hanzou: (He is still wearing a ninja mask, but he is also wearing a hair net and a white apron with 'IRON CHEF' on it in big, black letters.) Ah, you speak ... Waralese?

Narsha: Er, hai, I do, but only a little.

Hanzou: No problem, no problem, it is very good that you can speak a little Waralese. Can I get you something to eat?

Narsha: (She takes a deep breath before speaking.) I am ... looking for Hattori Hanzou. Do you know where he can be found?

Hanzou: (He is surprised that she knows who he is.) I know where you can find Hattori Hanzou. Follow me.

Narsha: (She follows him upstairs to a room filled with katana. Yogurt, unnoticed, is dismantling a Nokia N-Gage in one corner.)

Hanzou: Now, tell me ... who are you, and why are you here?

Narsha: My name is (BLEEP). (She walks over to a window, breathes on it, and, while there is still a foggy spot on the glass, she writes the name 'MAX' on it with one finger. Yogurt takes the battery out of the Nokia N-Gage and starts licking it until he shocks himself.)

Hanzou: ... I see. (Skip forward in time. In the same room, he hands her a very large mace.) If Guntz stands in your way, then ... Guntz will be squashed.

TO BE CONTINUED ... ?

Kayin

From: DragonUser84 | Posted: 6/23/2004 5:15:58 PM | Message Detail
Bleu: ATTENTION EVEYONE! I would like to make an announcement, THIS VERSION SUCKS! BIG TIME!
Max: You're only saying that because your stats got butchered.
Zylo: Hey, don't these clothes make me look like Hans?
Max: Listen Zylo, everyone's so used to the idea of you eating Hans that things were starting to become normal. Do you really have to dress in his clothes, too?
Zylo: Hey, I'm just trying a new look! It's not like someone's going to jump out of nowhere and try to eat me!
(At that point, Alef jumps out of nowhere and tries to eat Zylo.)
Max: (O.O) Well, this is a new twist...
(Yogurt appears with a hammer and a Shining Force cartridge for the Sega Genesis. Yogurt is about to smash the cart when Bleu attacks.)
Max: I think I'll go see if Zuika killed Mawlock yet...
(Bleu is just about to shred Yogurt when he thinks better of it and eats him. Bleu then puts on the helmet just for kicks.)
(Meanwhile...)
(Mawlock is tied to a chair and Zuika is standing in front of him.)
Mawlock: NO! NOT NARSHA IN HER TEENY BIKINI!!!
(Zuika grins wickedly as he puts a lighter to the edge of the card and burns it.) Once the card is reduced to ashes, he picks up another out of the pile.)
Mawlock: NOT MY PIKACHU!
Zuika: Wha-? (Looks at the card.) (O.O) EEEEEEEEEWWW!!! (Throws the card away like it's diseased.)
(A few feet away...)
Domingo: Zzzzz...
(Domingo gets hit with the card.)
Domingo: Domingo? (Looks at the card.) DOMINGO!!! (Domingo turns red and casts Supernova on it.) (I think he hates pokemon...)
Domingo: Domiiiiiiiiingooooooo! (Well, DUUUUUUUUUH!!!!!)
Mawlock: MY PIKAAAAACHUUUUUUUUUU!!!
Max: This is getting weirder than usual...
Nova: Oh Max, just so you know, Amon and Balbaroy are trying to make a third birdman, errr, birdkid.
(Alef suddenly comes running up, crying uncontrollably.)
Alef: Everyone, I... ATE ZYLO!!! (Resumes sobbing.)
Max: (Sighs.) Okay Nova, I need to make a withdraw...
Nova: Sorry Max-
Max: (With the Chaos Breaker pointed at Nova.) Don't tell me that I need to wait to make a withdraw!
Nova: No, we're out of gold...
Max: Great...
(Meanwhile...)
Zylo: So... this is what it's like to be eaten, huh?
Hans: Yeah, this is what it's like to be eaten...
Zylo: .........
Hans: ..........
Zylo: .........
Hans: ..........

Kayin

剩下的不帖了~  看来国外玩家们恨死HANS了
几乎每一个恶搞中都有HANS被吃掉的情节 -0-


PS  ME米时间翻译这些  看不懂的自己去弄个翻译软件

Kayin

忍不住又转了一篇18禁的 =0=


From: LancenWithmart | Posted: 6/25/2004 9:05:40 AM | Message Detail
(The shining force are closing to Runefaust, preparing for the final assault. Max are giving the final instructions)

Max: OK everybody, I want all the have hitters in the front lines, and STAY THERE, understand Zylo?
Zylo (looks sad for Hans): Ah...OK.
Hans: *huff*
Zylo (lowering the voice): I&acute;ll catch you later...
Max: *ahem* Musachi, you go for front...no Hanzou, you stay back.
Hanzou (with a murder looking for Musachi):...I hate you.
Musachi: *yah*
Max: Anri and Tao, you...wait a second, where are they?
Nova: Er...hum...
Max: Nova, do you see them?
Nova:Well...they are 'concentrating' for battle.
Max: Strange, that voice is the same that you used when you talk about Amon and Balbaro...wait a minute, are you KIDDING me right?!
Nova: Er...
Max: THIS IS RIDICULOUS! WE ARE A ARMY OF LIGHT, NOT A...
(Anri and Tao appeared with the clothes in complete confusion)
Anri: Ah...Max...hi, I...
Max:SO YOU ARE 'SPECIAL' FRIENDS NOW RIGHT? WE HAVE A REPUTATION TO MANTAIN, AND...
Mawlock: You are just jealous.
Max: SHUT UP!
Zuika: how do you know that?
Mawlock: Master of the cards. You never learn.
Zuika: What?!
Max: THERE ARE CHILDREN PLAY THIS GAME! YOU DON'T THINK ABOUT THE CONSEQUENCES?
Anri (smiling): So... you want join us?
(an astonishing silence echoes in the field)
Max: Are you...serious?
Anri and tao(smiling): Yes.
Nova: Talk about that later, we have a battle to win, right Max...Max?
Max: EEEEEEAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHH!!!!! AT LAAAAAAAAAASSSTTTTT!!!!!!!
(Max rushes for Gort and pick the flask of your hands)
Gort: You don't have the age for that, laddie!
Max: WHO CARES? I SEE YOU AROUND, FOLKS!
(run with Anri and Tao and disappears in the woods)
Nova: Well, this is new....
Zylo (with some white hairs in your mouth)*burp* Yes, but was funny.

Kayin

这个也很不错 - -


From: Sketchie | Posted: 6/25/2004 10:17:36 AM | Message Detail
Mawlock: *shuffling some cards* What game do you want to play Zuika?

Zuika: Hmmm... hold on. I'll be right back. *leaves*

*A few minutes passes...*

Zuika: *walks back in* Ok, I'm ready. Let's play Spoon. You know, where you have to put the cards in the appropriate order and have to empty your hand first to win.

Mawlock: Yeah, I know that game. *shuffles the deck and lays out 3 cards face-up on the table. He places several cards on the sides. He then separates the deck into two and gives one to Zuika* On 3, we'll start slapping down cards.

Zuika: Okay. *holds his deck up* 1...

Mawlock: *holds his up* 2...

Both: 3!!!

*Zuika suddenly slaps down cards like mad, rapidly emptying his hand. Mawlock just sits there in awe. After a few seconds, Zuika suddenly stops and yawns loudly, holding up a single card. He then calmly places it in the apportiate deck*

Zuika: I win.

Mawlock: *he still has his entire deck* What the...?

Zuika: I didn't even hide any cards. *shakes his arms and nothing comes out* So therefore I didn't cheat.

Mawlock: I... wow... you're good, Zuika.

Zuika: Thanks.

*Narsha walks in*

Narsha: Zuika!

Zuika: Narsha! Shhh!

Narsha: You're almost dead! *uses Aura 4 on Zuika, restoring him back to his full HP* There, much better. Now don't let that happen to you again!

Mawlock: ...

Zuika: *grins at Mawlock*

Mawlock: You... got yourself to critical condition just to make yourself faster... that's cheating!!

Zuika: Remember: You have to learn about your opponent's strengths and weaknesses before you play against 'em. You never learn. *grins*

Mawlock: GRRR!!! *pounces at Zuika*

Narsha: Boys, boys!

~Sketchie

Lichking

我要翻译。。。

黑ZERO

我要翻译。。。

是你来翻译还是你要看翻译的？